I’m going to attempt to write about something I know little about, but have been married long enough to have gained some insight… insight into what makes men act the way they do. When I say men, I use that in a general term because in society there are always going to be misfits and men with perversions. Here I am referring to your everyday normal red blooded male.

As you read this, remember that men were made by their Creator – in the image of God. So if it makes you feel any better, these traits are in some fashion a reflection of what God is like.

Men are warriors

• By nature men are warriors. They want to rescue their families, shoot their enemies, kill, maim and eat their prey. Do you wonder why your sons and husbands love violent video games, extreme sports and grotesque movies? Most of them don’t have to hunt and kill for food these days, or throw spears from the city wall to protect their families from on-coming enemies. Video games, sports and movies are often used as an outlet for their primal needs. So don’t freak out because they like them.

Warriors need others

• Warriors need others to champion their successes. Women are often the ones in the position to either break or make the spirit of a man. Women, you would be wise to help cultivate a man who is for you, and not against you. Celebrate his successes, lavish him with praises. Encourage the “warrior” in him.

A warrior is not a pervert

• Ladies, I know this one hurts, but men were created to enjoy and appreciate variety. They can’t help it; their nature wants it… variety in physical quests, variety in foods, variety in women, and in sexual activities. This doesn’t make them perverts, but if you can understand the instincts they have, you will be better equipped to help channel those desires in a healthy direction.

Warriors are needy

• If you don’t have the time or the patience to tend to a man’s needs, don’t bother getting into a relationship. They may be tough, rough and gruff on the outside, but deep inside there’s still a little boy who’s crying and craving attention. He’s going to get it from somewhere, so make sure you are the one meeting those needs well enough, that is, if you plan on keeping him.

Warriors are loyal

• This one thing I know for sure; If a woman is able to capture a man’s heart, encourage the warrior in him, create variety, cultivate intimacy, and lavish him with attention, he will be loyal to her til his dying breath. Ladies, do your part in understanding your man. Then he will build castles and homes for you, ride a thousand miles on horseback to rescue you. He will lie and die for you, and protect you from gossip and slander. He will forgive you of the worst possible offenses. He will be loyal! He will be your prince charming!

Men, did I get any of this right? Do you want to add or delete anything?

If you’re single and you’re a lady, you’re a lady in waiting… that is if you’re out there looking for a Mr. Right. There are a lot of Mr. Wrongs roaming around, so they’re much easier to find. Here are 7 clues to keep in mind while you’re searching.

Happy Hunting!

1. Only date guys that have the same values as you do. This one thing will set the tone for everything else in your relationship. You’re not gonna change him. Relationships are hard enough, so don’t start out ignoring clue number one.
2. Write down on a piece of paper 10 qualities you want in Mr. Right. If he misses 4 out of 10, keep hunting.
3. You can fall in love with just about anyone. Yes, you can! So guard your heart while dating until you know that you know which one is Mr. Right.
4. Get advice from close friends and family. If something stands out like a pink elephant, they’re gonna see it. They love you, so don’t take offense if they’re not supporting your dating choices.
5. Studies show that relationships that have common goals lasts longer. Be sure that the passions in his life are the passions in yours. If not, Mr. Right may easily turn into Mr. Wrong.
6. If you’re in good standing with your parents, (no matter how old you are) honor them by listening to their words of wisdom. They have that 6th sense that you lost when you started hunting.
7. Lastly ladies, don’t give the cookies away. If he wants you, he’ll marry you. If he only wants cookies, he can buy them anywhere. How will you know the difference unless you wait.

You can take these and add a few more. Anyone else have a clue?

1. I’m glad I’m not a rat. He ignores the sound of the trap from the ones that have gone before him. What happens to others can be lessons for me.
2. I believe that children are one of two things. I have to be discerning, most are angels in disguise, but some are devils coming to destroy.
3. The mouth speaks what fills the heart. I should look at my heart before I open my mouth.
4. Angels are real, that’s one reason I’m still alive.
5. Things are not always as they seem. If my hand in the air were a door that could open, I’d see into another world where good and evil battle.
6. The reason we have skinny people in the world is because they eat less food, like maybe a pickle would be a meal.
7. I’m careful what I say out loud, because I can be sure the devil hears it and will do his best to make it happen.
8. If I’m going down for something I’ve said or done, it’s not nice to take passengers with me.
9. If my kids tell me they are seeing things in the night, I feel certain they are.
10. As long as the water is wet, it matters not how I do it, but I must take a bath.

What are some things you know???

Hannah

A long time ago there was a man who lived in the Ephraim hills of Israel. His name was Elkanah. He had two wives. The first wife’s name was Hannah; the second was Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah did not. Hannah’s rival wife would often taunt her, reminding her that God had not given her any children.

A God who sees

Crushed in spirit Hannah cried out to God. As she cried in the sanctuary, her prayers were so intense that the prophet, Eli, thought she was drunk. She vowed to give him back to God, unreserved, and dedicate him to God’s service, if He would only give her a son.

A God who hears

God heard Hannah’s cries and saw the desperation in her prayers. He answered her and gave her a son. She named him Samuel, explaining, “I asked God for him.” Hannah also kept her promise and when he was old enough, she sent Samuel to serve in the sanctuary with the prophet, Eli

A God who answers

Samuel was not an ordinary person. From childhood Samuel began to hear the voice of God. He grew up and became the greatest prophet in Israel’s history. Two books of the Old Testament are named after him. Hannah thought she was asking for a son for herself, but the nation of Israel got a Prophet and a Judge with unparalleled measure.

Hannah’s God

We don’t always know what we are asking for when we lay our hearts before God. Hannah only knew that she could trust Him with her prayers, with her life and with her son. Later she prayed a prayer of thanksgiving. This prayer shows her heart and her trust in a God who sees all, hears all, and answers.

“My heart rejoices in the Lord;
My horn is exalted in the Lord.
I smile at my enemies,
Because I rejoice in Your salvation.

No one is holy like the Lord,
For there is none besides You,
Nor is there any rock like our God.”

This is about Hannah, so what about you?

Why carry a bat?

I was coming out of my neighborhood this morning, heading to the gym, when I spotted a girl I recognized taking a walk. Honking the horn to get her attention made her turn around and give me a not-so-friendly gesture with a big stick (a baseball bat to be exact.) My first thought was, who walks with a bat? Perhaps someone who wants to be ready with an intense defense mechanism in case a fierce dog approaches. Or perhaps someone who desires to take a swing at an unfriendly pedestrian. Or someone who wishes to scare away all kidnappers and rapists on the prowl.

Let wisdom be your bat.

The girl who was walking was my sister. She didn’t know who was honking, so she quickly took a defensive stance. She was intentional on using wisdom to keep her life safe. After she realized who I was, we exchanged grins. This got me thinking about how we need to be just as on guard in our spiritual lives. We should be wise as we walk, as our lives could literally be at stake. Wisdom is like walking with a big stick. Get some and use it as you walk through life.

Take this to heart.

Proverbs 4 

[ Your Life Is at Stake ] Listen, friends, to some fatherly advice; sit up and take notice so you’ll know how to live. I’m giving you good counsel; don’t let it go in one ear and out the other. When I was a boy at my father’s knee, the pride and joy of my mother, He would sit me down and drill me: “Take this to heart. Do what I tell you—live! Sell everything and buy Wisdom! Forage for Understanding! Don’t forget one word! Don’t deviate an inch! Never walk away from Wisdom—she guards your life; love her—she keeps her eye on you. Above all and before all, do this: Get Wisdom! Write this at the top of your list: Get Understanding! Throw your arms around her—believe me, you won’t regret it; never let her go—she’ll make your life glorious. She’ll garland your life with grace, she’ll festoon your days with beauty.” …

A fire underneath

As I walked through the woods today near Marshall Town, Liberia, I came near a clearing where I noticed a huge mound of dirt. Out of the mound smoke was escaping from several holes in the dirt. Not knowing what it was, I started asking questions. Deep underneath lay some wood and a simmering fire; the holes were allowing smoke to escape. After a period of time, the wood turns into charcoal. I had never seen anything like this before. It was fascinating, and the first thing I wanted to do was to dig through the dirt to see for myself.

What’s your fire?

What a perfect analogy of our hearts. We all have something simmering inside of us. Is it bitterness or forgiveness, hatefulness or love, jealousy or gratefulness, covetousness or contentment?  What ever it is, it will change you in some way, just as the wood will change into charcoal. I want to have the right kind of fire burning in my heart. What about you?

Living the life of a troll?

Today I was on my way to the brand new (and I’m proud of) embassy of the United States of America. Parking right outside the gates, my friend drew my attention to the bridge we were on. He said, “Do you know that families and whole communities live under this bridge?” Wow, no! The only image I have of life under a bridge is the story about the Three Billy Goats Gruff, and the Troll that lived under the bridge they were trying to cross. My curiosity got the best of me to see what I could learn about these people who use the underparts of a bridge as their rooftops.

Life under a bridge

What is life like under this bridge? Here goes the response from my friend:

• life under the bridge provides shelter from the sun and the rain
• generations have been born, lived and died here
• men try to find manuel labor during the day to buy food for their families
• manuel labor may include owning a wheel barrow to help shoppers carry their loads in the market place
• no sunlight for vegetation growth
• people travel above ground to abandoned houses to makeshift toilets
• for privacy, bathing is done under the bridge before dawn or after dark
• candles are used for light
• children come outside to play while parents are looking for food
• their only ambition is to survive each day

How do you respond to this kind of poverty?

This is complete poverty I have seen here. The scriptures say “the poor you will always have with you.” To answer the question of what someone can do to help would be a very difficult question to answer. There is no education and no knowledge of another kind of life. So any help becomes a temporary answer for those living under the bridge. You may save a life for a day, but what happens after that? Unless some brave soul comes to establish an education system for the little ones, this community will continue raising their children under a bridge.

“There is a difference between devotion to a Person and devotion to principles and cause.” ~ Oswald Chambers

We can have grand principles that we live by and great causes we would die for, but all is in vain if the devotion in not truly to a Person… the Person of Jesus Christ. How do we get to know this Person? Is it by talking to the air or beating our fists on the wall? 

 How do we get it?

Seriously, some of us try to get into this relationship through thought-out ideas, while others follow an invisible book of rules. But no man can come to the Person of Jesus Christ except he/she is drawn by the Holy Spirit. And how are we drawn? Is it by our own asking, and/or by mere providence? 

What I know is that the Spirit is intentional when He visits a person. The heart must be ready in some sense to receive this divine intervention. This intervention to say the least, will draw a person into that relationship with Jesus Christ. 

What does this mean?

And what does all of this mean? Well, this is one of those mysteries we may never fully understand here on earth. But when a person is drawn by the Holy Spirit to the Person, he knows it! There is no confusion, and that life is forever changed.

Do you truly know the Person or are you still living by grand principles or a cause? This is certainly a challenge to me.

Hello Dreamer

When we think about dreams and aspirations, we often think about adults wanting success in life, on the job, in business, with maybe a little bit of luck involved. What if you were a young boy growing up in Africa? Would you be able to dream, and if so, what would that look like? Perhaps we are not different at all from someone far away.

Let me introduce you to Trokon, a 13 year old that has managed to make it to fourth grade. His father disowned him as a baby because of a skin disease. He managed to survive with his mother, and is very optimistic about his future. Although ridiculed in school for his stance on religion and his ability to out-score the other kids, he’s not focused on that. He is a dreamer…

Dreams… that is what has made this kid successful so far. As we walked on the beach today, he shared with me all that was on his heart for the future. He sees himself as one paving a path unlike anyone in his family. For me, it is fascinating. Here is a 13 year old, only privileged to have 4 years of school, but still has hope for a better future.

Trokon dreams of first becoming a math teacher, geometry in specific, he says. Next he aspires to obtain further degrees in history and science. He is fascinated with his country’s history and particularly things of the civil war. I could tell these dreams were well thought out and burning on his heart.

Trokon currently has a sponsor for school through Samarantan’s Purse. He’s not like other African’s his age. Even though he is 13 years old, he has managed to make it to fourth grade. He is fortunate, he is smart, he has a sponsor, and he is a dreamer.

Awaken your dreams

What are your dreams? Have you let them die? Hope Trokon’s story will encourage you to awaken yours. Perhaps they have been there since you were a child. One thing I know; even if you have forgotten, God has not. Dig down deep and bring those dreams back to life.

Makpah and all the others

I’m sitting in the airport, checking Facebook while I wait for my flight, and notice my cover image; it’s one with me standing with the village kids at Henry Village. In the crowd of kids, I spot three in particular that have been stuck on my heart since I first met them over a year ago: Makpah, a girl about 14, Sam, a boy about 7, and Wonsa, a boy about 5. When I’m in Henry Village, these are my kids. What made them stand apart from all the other kids, I’m not sure. When I’m not there, I think about them and pray for them.

Letters A and B

Makpah doesn’t speak much English, and I speak very little Bassa (village dialect,) so communication often goes through her brother, Sam, whose English is just a tad better. None of them have ever been to school, so they can’t read or write or even spell their names. Last year while visiting I got the biggest thrill out of holding a pen with Makpah trying to help her write the letter A and the letter B. Seemed so strange that a 14 year old would be writing like a 3 year old.

Do something Now for Someone later

Perhaps it’s too late for Makpah and her siblings, but they remind me that things could be different in the the lives of those younger and those not yet born in their village. They may have a chance at school IF I do something NOW. Not just a chance at school, but a chance at Eternal Hope.

Henry Village is only one of many reasons I feel compelled to lay some ground work in my birth home, Liberia. The opportunities to make a difference are endless, and for me, it’s very personal. I feel personally responsible to utilize the gifts and privileges I’ve been afforded to help people in the country I grew up in.

I’m thankful

• for being exposed to another world at a young age
• for marrying a man who sets an example for me
• for the love and commitment of an extended family
• for the privilege of being in a loving and diverse church
• for individuals who have loved me through the years
• for friends that think I’m crazy, but support me anyway
• for a God that guides every moment of my life.

Where have you been placed in this world for such a time?